tears…

Dear Whoever You Might Be,

Today’s sermon rocked me.  We are back in Proverbs and we were in chapter 7 today.  Solomon was talking to his sons telling him a story about an adulteress and how hew ways lead to death.

Death….how many of my ways have been leading to death?  Pastor Tom said last week that sexual sins are like ripples in the water after you throw a rock.  The effect everyone and everything.  Your past, present and future relationships.  All the sermons and blogs lately I have read have been talking about sex because of the move Magic Mike and the books 50 Shades of Gray.

I absolutely will not read those books.  A man consumed with sex, controlling, bondage, “toys”, “playroom”.… Why would I want to read books about that when I lived that? Just the thought makes me ill.

Anyway off my soapbox dear.

Many tears have been shed this week over many things.  Friend’s leaving, plans changing, family hurts….sigh I wish you were around.

I missed going to my study on Tuesday.  I am enjoying it so much. 

Love I pray you are plugging into a community so very much.  Our kids really need a man around.  And if I haven’t said it yet, yes love there is a difference between a man and a guy.  I married a guy once..I need and pray for a man.

We are waiting to hear about Tarzan’s EEG results this week.  I miss my sleep.  I woke up this morning and though I missed some of the mascara I was wearing yesterday when I looked in the mirror.  Nope it wasn’t mascara I’m just that tired!

I came across a new group this week.  They are called billy.  I love, love, love their songs.  Digging Your Heels In, the first song on their EP billy by billy and the song Locked and Loaded get to me.  I really don’t want to deal with the wreckage in my past sometimes.  Sigh…

I miss you my love.

Always,

Waiting Patiently….(trying…G-d is working on me…)